“I feel like one little mistake and you’re out of there. They delete you or they just ghost you. You can’t even mess up for one split second.”
A buddy confided in me about his Tinder experiences. He was a decent dude. He was new to the world of digital dating. He was stressed out because he was experiencing the realities of our generation. In a word with tons of options, it’s easy to move on after the slightest mistake. It’s pretty common to want to keep on searching for the next big thing.
This is the exact same thing that’s ruining your new business and your financial goals. You always think that there’s something better around the corner. You’re approaching your goals the same way Tinder users approach dating.
“All your ideas may be solid or even good .. But you have to Actually EXECUTE on them for them to matter.” – Gary Vaynerchuk
It’s alarming how many decent people I meet that are loitering and wasting their time. You get one shot at this life and you can’t spend it on putting off decisions while you wonder why someone didn’t respond to you. We’re going to look at how your Tinder mindset is hurting your freelancing career.
What’s the Tinder Trap?
I’m assuming that you know what Tinder is. In case you don’t, here’s the official Wikipedia definition:
“Tinder is a location-based social search mobile app that allows users swipe left or right and allows users to chat if both parties swiped to the right. The app is used as a dating app or hookup app, depending on the user’s individual preference.”
You get to choose whether you would like to potentially speak to someone and then try to hook up with or date based on a profile consisting of a few paragraphs and pictures. I may have been on this app before.
How does this apply to your business?
It’s easy to think that you have a million different options waiting out there.
Nobody wants to settle with anything. It’s more fun to just wait around until the next thing comes around.
- If you don’t feel like doing a second episode of your YouTube show, you just start working on your podcast or your new Facebook page.
- That blog idea wasn’t meant to be. You’re going to start investing in weed stocks now.
Who cares if something doesn’t pan out, right? There’s always another option. You can swipe right on the next business opportunity.
You’re always holding out for something different, better, or just new.
How’s the Tinder Trap ruining your business goals?
I met for coffee with a friend who has been sharing motivational videos non-stop. This guy wants to start an online business but he doesn’t know what to focus on. This is a common scenario.
I see friends on social media jumping around between different ideas.
They treat their business plans like most of us do Tinder and other mobile dating apps. Swipe and see what’s next. There has to be something better around the corner, right?
How’s your Tinder-like approach to business ruining everything for your business?
You don’t focus on anything.
How terrible is our focus these days?
I checked Facebook at least 12 times while writing this article and I wrote mainly at night-time. There’s obviously nothing happening. Why did I have to check so much?
When you have the Tinder mindset, you’re always thinking about what’s next. You don’t focus on one thing.
You think that you can do better.
This business is okay, but your next business idea will get you rich.
Guess what? You can’t always do better!
This could be the best thing right now. Don’t wait for the next social media platform to hit. Learn how to promote on the current platforms that exist.
You give up at the first sight of trouble.
Your book doesn’t sell many copies, you can’t find a freelancing client after one ad, or nobody watches you new YouTube video. Alright, time to move on to the next idea.
Why not try to fix things? Why not tweak something? Why must you give up so easily?
Here are a few possible scenarios of what could’ve gone wrong:
- Maybe your sales page sucked.
- Maybe you didn’t promote hard enough.
- Maybe you didn’t promote right.
- Maybe your videos just suck.
- Maybe you just have to produce more.
There’s a good chance that you’re delusional.
A friend showed me the profile of a gorgeous female on Tinder that he matched with. It was obviously a fake account. The pictures were clearly stolen from someone’s profile. He thought that he was going to go on a date with a supermodel. It turned out to be a bot. So he returned to looking for the next supermodel.
I’m all for believing in yourself. I just don’t want you to become delusional.
I know far too many friends that share motivational videos all day. They actually think that this qualifies as productive work.
You don’t build anything.
It’s important to build in business. Sometimes your business or YouTube show or podcast won’t take off until its 5th year. Sometimes, you’re going to have to actually put some effort in.
You have to get into the habit of building things. The time will pass regardless. You might as well be working on something that you’re proud of. I’m so happy that I never gave up on Studenomics.
What do you do about this if you want to make money?
You don’t have to delete Tinder off your phone. I wouldn’t dare ask you to do such a thing (unless you’re in a committed relationship).
Here’s what I plan on doing this year (yes, this article is mainly for me):
Set one goal.
What do you want to do? What exactly do you want to do? When do you want to have this done by?
The following are NOT examples of goals:
- I want to share my passions.
- I want to inspire others to be passionate.
- I want to be authentic.
Don’t be one of those losers.
The following are actual goals:
- I want two new freelancing clients by next month at $100 a project.
- I want to have my portfolio done by the Monday so that I can pitch.
- I’ll launch my new blog with 3 1,000 word articles by January 20th.
See everything out.
See things out. Don’t be so quick to give up.
- Launch that course.
- Give that relationship a shot.
- Get your first paid client before you start bragging about your new freelancing career.
- Record 5 podcast episodes before you launch.
Get quick feedback.
This is the one thing that I love about mobile dating. you can set up a quick coffee date to see if there’s any chemistry.
This applies to business because if you’re going to fail, you fail fast.
Get feedback from successful people.
I overheard two buddies sharing dating advice one time at the gym. They were both confused. The one guy then told me how the tips didn’t seem to work. I asked him why he would take advice from someone who was in a miserable relationship.
It doesn’t matter if you want to settle down by the end of the year or launch a podcast, it’s important that you always take advice from people who’ve seen positive results.
Get advice from people who are successful in what you want to do. Don’t just look for your friends or parents to tell you how great you are.
Work on your focus.
This is my biggest struggle in my life. I try to do so many different things, but I have no focus. I never get good anything. I go from trying to write a blog post, to working on my Instagram, to BJJ class. I never direct 100% of my energy towards one task.
There’s no quick fix here. Let’s just try to work on our focus.
This article is as much important for me as it is for you guys. I took all year to launch a course. I haven’t published as much I should. I’ve been too distracted. This is the biggest battle that our generation will deal with. The information overload is real and the options are abundant.
Check out the following video and links for more guidance!
- Why you should always make more money.
- Freelancing vs. an online business?
- 4,000 words on starting freelancing.
- Finding freelance experience.
- Start an online business right now.
Moving forward, let’s try to focus on one goal at a time. See that business idea out. Don’t be so quick to change your mind. Let’s not look for excuses to give up.
“The owner of an idea is not he who imagines it, but he who executes it.” — M.J. DeMarco
2 thoughts on “Why Your Tinder Mindset Is Destroying Your Chances of Making Money”
At the end of the day the person needs to get rid of that Tinder mindset because it feeds on FALSE EXPECTATIONS. I was the same way but now I focus on a few goals and do the best I can.
I hear you Saruj. It’s tempting to just want to move on to the next big thing instead of focusing down on the task at hand.